Just some thoughts...

Yea! 2010! It's so crazy how time has been flying by. One minute I'm a insecure teenager and by the next blink I'm looking at my 20th birthday (though not necessarily any less insecure). I've grown so much in the past two years (emotionally, mentally, and spiritually) but at times I still look around and see everyone "growing up" and deciding what to do with their life while I feel like I'm sitting by going "Wait a second! I'm not an adult!" Then there are the times when I know that I'm doing exactly what I'm suppose to be doing. I've noticed how it can be really difficult. Some times it feels like you're supposed to be preparing for the future and yet at the same time, you're denied access to it. This morning's sermon was about living your life by markers (ie - when I turn 20, when I graduate college, when I start my career, when I *fill in the blank*). How far do I have to go/ what do I have to accomplish before X, Y, or Z happens? I've had recent events make me question what it is that I really want. In a panic I ran to godly advisors and self-help books. After getting frustrated because I didn't feel like I was getting anywhere, God seemed to just kinda tap me on the shoulder and say "You're pursuing all this, but the reason you're frustrated is because you aren't asking me". While I thought I had been handling things well, I realized I was looking for my answers in people and books. I felt kinda like Peter when he walked on water. I can get so caught up in what's going on that sometimes I forget that if I would just re-focus and put my eyes back on God, half my issues wouldn't even be problems. I'm not a "New Year's Resolution" kinda girl, but I think that this is going to be my focus for this next year: sheerly pursuing God and not worrying about everything else. I encourage you as you make your resolutions to seriously consider letting God handle the little things in your life. After all - stress (at least mine) is more often a bunch of little things than it is 1 or 2 big things. He'll take care of the little things (and the big ones) if you let Him. Happy New Year everyone! :)